Tag: #bestdecluttertip

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“Don’t talk me out of my feelings”~Ethel Anne Roome-Certified Grief Recovery Specialist

Dealing with the loss of a loved one during COVID19

Consider Creating A Second-Best Funeral

Condolences and how to comfort others

Lack of traditional support

Ways to create the 2nd best way to comfort yourself AND honor your loved one

Virtual support or support by mail

How can we lean on others, so many are afraid of grief

Condolences Focusing on positivity- Ethel Anne’s take on this

Do hobbies help and how do we determine what benefits us

Favorite ice cream: vanilla with caramel sauce

Song that reminds Ethel-Anne of her youth and why: The Stroll, American Bandstand with her dad

Leisure time: Flower Arranging

Book mentioned: Feelings Buried Alive Never Die, by Karol Kuhn Truman

Ethel-Anne Roome
Certified Grief Recovery® Specialist

Phone: 203-262-8326
Email: earoome@gmail.com

www.GriefRecoveryStartsHere.com 

Go to the Grief Recovery Institute website for more information on funerals and other grief topics.

DeClutter By Deirdre

To get in touch with me write to DeClutterByDeirdre@gmail.com

Thank you for listening, I appreciate YOU!!

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My guest today is Stephanie Dalfonzo who has spent more than 20 years researching holistic, natural, and scientifically proven ways to more than just manage stress and anxiety but build emotional resilience and truly break free from its vice-like grip. Stephanie is the author of  Goodbye Anxiety, Hello Freedom: How to Build Resilience and Overcome Anxiety I thought it was important to speak with her now that stress and anxiety have a tight grip on a lot of us. 

“When listening to someone, ask what’s going right, right now?” ~Author Stephanie Dalfonzo

Stephanie Dalfonzo- Holistic, Natural Assistance for Anxiety Tips from today:

  • Statistic- Prescriptions for anti-anxiety have increased by 34.1 percent in February 2020
  • One size anxiety relief does not fit all
  • Simple works
  • It’s a practice; never too late to start reducing anxiety
  • Know that you can get past this- it’s a rough spot
  • When listening to someone, ask what’s going right, right now?
  • Don’t create your own PTSD
  • High power, two-minute pose- body language impact
  • Smiling creates happy hormones
  • Rest, digest and relax

Favorite ice cream: mint chocolate chip and butter brickle

Song that reminds you of your youth and why: Got to be Real

Her book is Goodbye Anxiety, Hello Freedom: How to Build Resilience and Overcome Anxiety found on Amazon.com  https://www.amazon.com/Goodbye-Anxiety-Hello-Freedom-Resilience/dp/0999887009/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2HJCQTADA1KD3&dchild=1&keywords=goodbye+anxiety+hello+freedom&qid=1594661766&sprefix=goodbye+anxiety%2Caps%2C195&sr=8-1

To contact Stephanie Dalfonzo:  sd@StephanieDalfonzo.com

To get in touch with Deirdre at DeClutter By Deirdre, you can email me at declutterbydeirdre@gmail.com

Thank you for listening, I appreciate you!

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My guest today is Cynthia Perthuis who leads and owns the Senior Care Authority offices in New York City and Southwest Florida. Cynthia has a passion for helping others and advocating for those that do not have the ability to speak for themselves. Her own personal experience with her parents and her entrepreneurial background has helped so many family members with the stress of helping and caring for aging loved ones. 

I thought today we could chat about “The Talk”.  The Talk is having a discussion with a loved one about being alone in their home is no longer an option, it isn’t safe.

Are you trying to help someone who needs more care to make the decision to move out of their home? 

Helping an older person choose to move from their home to assisted living is never easy. She answers:

         What are the steps to having The Talk

             What are the ways to have The Talk

             Who should have The Talk

             What are some things to watch out for

Cynthia is an advocate, providing guidance on elders staying at home, or seeking assisted living options, here are some of her suggestions:

  • The talk with a parent/parents may require more than one conversation
  • Baggage regarding the conversation- might be fear, other factors
  • Begin the talk with pen and paper; record what you’re thinking
  • Identify the players, before the talk- may include siblings, Attorney- they all need to be on the same page with the person impacted by the decision to move or stay in place
  • Identify any challenges- financial, misinformation
  • Teachable moments- 911 calls, for example
  • Selfless phrases- it is about the person and not whoever begins the discussions
  • Choose the correct time for the talk
  • In-person tours of locations/virtual tours, and stipulate what is offered- trips, activities, food on offer

Favorite ice cream:  Halo Top mint chocolate chip

The song that reminds you of your youth:  Boys of Summer

Leisure time activity:  Cynthia has recently discovered pickleball, yoga

Connect to Cynthia at www.scanyfl.com  cynthia@seniorcareauthority.com

You can connect with me at declutterbydeirdre@gmail.com  or listen to the Magnificent Aging Podcast.

Thank you for listening I appreciate you.

“I believe in bringing out your (inner) beauty because your inner beauty is what everybody is attracted to.”   

“It isn’t always about makeup…sleep is #1 and your water intake.”

~Candee Caldwell

Makeup Artist Candee Caldwell talks to Deirdre about the importance of self-care before you put on any makeup.

  • Which feature Candee feels is the most important to accent.
  • The one piece of makeup you should apply if you are only choosing one.
  • Hints to feeling your best and most confident self.
  • Her goal when someone sits in her makeup chair.
  • How to choose makeup colors that work for each individual.
  • How Candee helps women re-entering careers, dating, marriage.
  • Does product price matter?
  • Favorite print shoots: Ethan Allen Interiors, Branson Emerson
  • The importance of volunteering

Favorite ice cream flavor:   Maple Walnut

Song reminds Candee of her youth:  ABC Jackson 5

Leisure time:  Enjoy family time, travel, walking, listening to podcasts, music

Do you have any events coming up?  October 3 Pink Aid

You can hire Candee Caldwell to show you how to use products you already own, in the privacy of your own home.

Contact info:  www.CandeeCaldwell.com or 203-470-3506

Thank you so much Candee for your time and knowledge share!

This episode is sponsored by DeClutter By Deirdre, A Senior Move management. Helping You and Your Loved Ones DeClutter, Move & Live a Fuller Life. Take a look at my website and contact me to work together.www.DeClutterByDeirdre.com 

**Download~Like~Positive Review Magnificent Aging**

Thank you for listening, I appreciate you!

My client’s mom said as she was going through her items: “I have no idea why I bought so many of the same items when I don’t remember having bought them”.

Has that happened to you?

Are you even aware of this type of purchasing behavior?

This comment was a result of our DeClutterer realizing that she had over purchased slips throughout the years.  Instead of culling through and getting rid of the ones that no longer fit, had dried out elastic waistbands and were discolored from years of washing she pushed them to the back of the drawer.  Now, she was rightsizing her home, getting rid of the larger home 2 to 3 hours away from her daughter (depending on traffic) and she needed to downsize her prized possessions and necessities.

Mindless spending and purchasing happen to all of us at some point.  We don’t want to run out of an item or we know we have an event coming up but the fear of looking for and trying on that item tells our brain we need to buy another one and perhaps another one, “just in case”.  OR, we’ve been lulled into a purchase via the advertising of BOGO, buy one get one free.  There is no freedom if it’s taking up space in your closet or drawer or mind!

Take inventory before you purchase something that might be hidden in a drawer, try it on, look for signs of wear or age and get rid of it BEFORE purchasing one to replace it.  You might not need to spend money at all!

Take a quick peek at my website www.DeClutterByDeirdre.com for more.

Imagine this…you recently purchased a new home and are moving out of your 5th-floor apartment.  You are excited to move to your new home because it means you have rightsized for your current life and it’s a little bit easier for you to see family and friends.

You’ve already washed all your new-to-you cabinets, drawers and bathrooms.  You’ve washed and polished the floors and had someone come in to professionally clean the rugs.  You’ve put your dishes, glasses, towels in their proper place.  You’ve got a small chair that fit in your car for you to sit on and you’ve taken all of the manageable pieces already.  You see your signature style popping through in your new dwelling.

You contact a “mover” to take everything out of your 5th-floor dwelling to your new home.  The “movers” arrive on time, 9 am sharp!  They hang the wall protectors on the elevator walls and head up to take your items to the truck.  This is the first time they’ve been to your home to see what you will be moving.  First up, the sleeper sofa.  They carry the sleeper to the elevator, remove the drop ceiling so it fits and…it doesn’t fit.  Now what?  The only way it’s getting downstairs to the truck is if they carry it.  Well, they decide there is no way they are going to carry it down 5 flights of stairs, so they leave.  No “goodbye”, no “we are sorry”, no “we will send someone else to handle it”.

This happened to someone my husband spoke to last week.  The person who was moving looked up help for moving, got a name, chatted on the phone, got a “good” price and set up a move date.  No one came to preview the job.  No contract, no deposit, no guarantee.  Therefore, the “movers” were able to walk away without a word or second glance when moving the furniture presented the slightest challenge.

Look out for yourself, especially during a high-stress time in your life (regardless if you are happy or not about your move).  Find out if the company is registered in your state.  Get a contract that lays out all of the rules, what you are obligated to do and what the mover is obligated to do.  Movers are highly regulated and if the price you get is significantly lower than a legitimate company, investigate the reason why.  Do not leave things to chance and take their word, I’m sorry to say that doesn’t work anymore.  Believe me, I know things happen and vendors might not be able to help you with what you need to accomplish in the end but at least they would tell you they were leaving and explain how they couldn’t fulfill their agreement.

Avoid stress, make sure they are legitimate so you don’t get caught in a debacle, create a peaceful life and contact me for tips on moving.

 

Decide on a housing budget based on the least amount of money you can afford

Get a map and narrow down the area of the country where you think you want to live.

Narrow that area to 100 square miles

Take a look at amenities in each town and how much they align with your interests

Explore areas of 3 towns that fit into your housing budget and interests

Visit the top 3 choice towns once every quarter to understand it’s seasons

Choose one town

Start Early, Good Luck, Contact Me if you Need Help!

You’re moving.  And, you’re moving far from your comfortable 5-mile radius.  In that 5-mile (or less) radius is your grocery store and you know exactly where they keep the brand of ice cream you love.

Your pharmacy where the pharmacist knows all your ailments for the past 20 years and which medicines work best for your ailment.

Your house of worship, why that religious leader knows what you’ve been through as your children we entering young adulthood.

Your mechanic, the one you trust to fix your car, just by listening to it, the proper way and not overcharge you.

Your favorite meeting spot where, as soon as you walk in the door, they are preparing your favorite drink for you without asking.

And your friends, the people you call when you need a ride, someone to chat with, someone to come over and decide which color you should paint the walls to go with your new furniture.

All of a sudden it hits you, you will be without your support system.

Where will you shop?

Where will you meet up with friends?

Where will you find friends?

Holy cow, that can be very scary!

Guess what?  You can fulfill all of these needs at your new home with deliberate social connections.  Get out of the house and start creating new social connections the first day!

Make it your mission to immediately find a new coffee shop that brings a smile to your face when you walk in.

Seek out a grocery store with exceptional service.

Drive by a couple of auto mechanic workshops and have a little chat.

Join a club where you can pursue social connections.

Finally, ReConnect Live with friends and neighbors from your former home, call them.

Moving changes an address, not a relationship.

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Are you storing obsolete technology equipment in your attic or basement?  If yes, you could be holding onto treasure or space grabbing junk!

It’s so funny to hear that saying that everything comes into vogue again in relationship to technology and it’s hard to believe in our fast-paced world of technology that it would apply but it sometimes does.  There are some people who like and miss the sound of the keyboards from the 80’s and they will pay for those keyboards, not many, but they are there if you wait.

There are also people who would like to own the colorful Macintosh’s so if you have that type of technology, pull it out and try to sell it or donate to a theater or local group who put on plays.  Let them store it and you will have the knowledge you helped someone out.

My guess is most of the technology you have stored are stored for a reason because it’s obsolete and you cannot use it so, recycle it.

Have your older storage drives, discs, tapes moved onto new technology if professionals can accomplish that for you.

The original faxes seemed to have disappearing ink so if you have very old faxed documents that you will need in the future have them saved onto a different technology before the ink fades.   Recycle the used fax paper that you no longer need but check about the shiny coated paper.

Continuously update all the data you have stored on technology as you replace it with new technology that way when you purchase new equipment, you’ll be prepared to recycle it instead of store it, saving you from a later headache.

Sign up for my newsletter on my homepage http://www.declutterbydeirdre.com/

See that yellow bowl?  It means a lot to me!

The yellow coating is gone from the rim, it’s got some chips, and silver scrapes on the inside left behind from utensils.  Every time I reach for it to use for vegetables, salad, popcorn, fruit, I smile a BIG smile and feel a sense of joy.  The reason I smile so big is that it reminds me of family, friends and good times at the lake.   I think it was used at almost every supper at the lake!

Not long ago my brother was visiting and when I took it out, he asked if that was the bowl from the lake and my immediate thought was “Oh no, he’s not going to ask me for it is he?”.  I said “Yes”, and he said “Great”!  PHEW!  It was triggering happy memories for him as well.

“The lake” represents our family’s childhood in summer. It was a place our family, extended family and friends gathered every weekend. We would power boat, sunfish sail, swim, jet-ski, suntan, fish, flirt, nap, develop long-lasting friendships, understand each other more and what made us tick through conversations, sneak out to our friends’ houses, play ping pong in the clubhouse and create truly lifelong memories of joy.

I don’t remember ever using a key to open the door during the summer because it was always unlocked and open to whoever wanted to stop by. And, everyone knew they just had to walk in, no knocking, no ringing of the doorbell, that’s the kind of place it was and that long-ago happiness is what I re-experience every time I use that yellow bowl.

Of course, I talk a lot about DeCluttering but I don’t want you to get rid of everything in your home: whether you are aging in place or moving to a new home.  Do you have a treasure in your possession that brings you an overabundance of happiness and joy, but most others wouldn’t appreciate it because it’s not tied to anything emotionally triggering in their minds? I want you to keep 1 or 2 treasures that bring you deep happiness and joy to look at and use.

Write down the memories and feelings those one or two items create for you then use them, love them, relive the feeling of happiness they give you. This might also help you pass along other treasures of yours that might not have the same importance and make your DeCluttering a little bit easier.

Tell me, did you pick out an item?  What does it represent to you?